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Community Corner

Town Mourns Beloved Coach

Carlos Gonzalez battled lung cancer for two years before his death last week.

A moment of silence opened the Hamden Fathers’ baseball game last week, the night the Scorpions, a team of 11- and 12-year-olds, learned that their coach, Carlos Gonzalez, had died.   

The boys took the field with black armbands on the left sleeves of their light-blue uniforms, while coaches and parents wore black ribbons as a tribute to the 50-year-old Hamden resident who coached in the league for 17 years. 

Gonzalez was awaiting a lung transplant when he died at the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center on May 30.  "Los,” as his friends and players called him, was diagnosed with lung cancer in May 2009, even though he never smoked.  

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Over the years Gonzalez had gotten to know many players and their families, and many were introduced to him at the Hamden Fathers Opening Day ceremonies a month before his death.

He was a guest of honor and his daughter, Caitlin, spoke in support of Lungs for Los, a foundation set up to help his family pay their non-medical expenses. Supporters sold T-shirts and wristbands and collected donations throughout the season.

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Gonzalez became a coach when his son, Justin, was a young child, and continued to volunteer long after Justin aged out of the league.    

“When he first drafted my son,” says Jeff Rowe, “he was the only coach that called and asked to speak to my son – most coaches ask for the parents. He (Gonzalez) welcomed him to the team and told him what would be expected of him.”   

Rowe’s son has played for the Scorpions for three years, and says that Gonzalez became “really more of a father figure than a coach” to the team.

The Scorpions consistently finish at the top of the standings in the Hamden Fathers “Majors Gold” league. But even opponents have fond memories of ’Los.   

Scott Millea coached against Gonzalez for four years, and described him as “dedicated to the kids he coached, not just with baseball but academically…. A great mentor and role model.”

The coach stayed in touch with many of his former players, said Mary Lord, whose son is now 15 and was the 2011 Rookie of the Year at Hamden Hall.

“We lost a wonderful man,” she said at a Tuesday night “Lungs for ’Los” fundraiser at Eli’s on Whitney. “My son was a good athlete, but Carlos would also talk to him about doing well in school and being a better citizen.”   

The restaurant was crowded with friends sharing memories, many of them just returning from Gonzalez's wake earlier that evening.  

Another former player, Matt Chudoba, became best friends with Justin Gonzalez through Carlos Gonzalez’s team and gave a eulogy at the funeral Mass Wednesday at St. Joan of Arc Church.   

He was “extremely important in my life, beyond belief,” said Chudoba, who described himself as “Carlos’  second son.”

Matt and Justin, along with several other volunteers, will continued to coach the Scorpions this season.

Speaking from the Gonzalez family home Sunday night, Matt Chudoba said the family was “in shock” because Carlos had been doing well up until a few days before he died. Chudoba had been with the Gonzalez family in Pittsburgh.  

Only days before his death New Haven Register reporter Ann DeMatteo wrote of his quest for a lung transplant and efforts to raise the necessary funds for that surgery.

“What was just as hard,” Chudoba said, was coming back to Hamden a few days later.   At the apartment the family rented in Pittsburgh, “it wasn’t like we were going back to the memories…. but then (at home), he wasn’t there when we walked in the door.”

At Saint Joan of Arc church Wednesday morning, Chudoba told mourners the day he was drafted by Carlos “forever changed the course of my life,” describing him as “the greatest man I ever got to know.”

Chudoba’s own father died, also of lung cancer, in 2009. But like his father, Chudoba said, “just because you can’t physically see Coach doesn’t mean for a second lung cancer defeated him because it didn’t.”

Gonzalez’s legacy will live on through Hamden Fathers baseball; the Lungs for Los Foundation; and the Family House of Pittsburgh, the  organizations his family has suggested for any memorial donations.   

He is survived by his wife of 26 years, Cindy Gonzalez; daughter Caitlin and son Justin, as well as his mother Adela Gonzalez of Levittown, New York and sister Lissette Bisso of St. James, New York.    He was born in Havana, Cuba in 1961 and was the son of the late Aurelio Gonzalez. 

He was, as his “second son” described him, “a coach for everyone.”  

 “Lungs for Los” to Continue

“Now that ’Los has passed, the nature of the Foundation has changed,” says family friend Emily Unger. They’re now raising money “for other families and individuals that are in the same position.” Donations will go toward helping patients pay for expenses that are not covered by insurance.

For instance, the Gonzalez family had to move to Pittsburgh temporarily for the coach’s medical treatment.

“This would help people relocate,” according to Unger.

At least three more fundraisers are planned:  A Fathers Day dinner on Friday, June 24th at the ; an Bar Day on Sunday, July 17th; and a pizza party at BAR in New Haven on Friday September 9th.  

More information is at LungsforLos.com.   

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